Sincerely, Your PenPal
by Shauds02
Summary: A series of letters between Jason Todd and Eddie Bloomberg in an AU where Jason got in touch with his old pen pal after the Lazarus Pit.
1. Dear Eddie (i)

**Takes place right after Young Justice broke up, but before Jason killed Egon** **xxx**

Dear Eddie.

Your pen-pal here saying hello from beyond the grave.

Bet you didn't expect to be hearing from me again, huh. Do me a favor and ignore Postman Pat the ninja over there. Kinda hard to find a courier service on this side of the line you know.

Not really sure why I'm writing this damned thing or if I'll even let it get sent out. The woman I'm staying with now thinks it's a good idea, but I'm, not sure I agree with her (she's a little crazy, but don't let that get back to her). It's been what, two years since I last wrote you?

I'd ask how your Aunt Marla is, but I heard what happened to her and I, know this won't come across great on paper, but that's fucked up. You know I know how it feels and there's nothing I can say that'll in fuck it up, but if there's something I can do from halfway across the world here, that'll take some of the edge off, you can write me at the return address.

Caught you on the news and damn, that suit of yours looks like hell. Sure it's fitting given the whole Kid Devil thing, but you're dedicating a little too much to your craft if it means you're running around in that.

If you're looking to get yourself killed, there're a ton of easier ways to go about it. Trust me, I know. If it's because of your aunt, you know she wouldn't have liked seeing that, so maybe get that suit checked out? I know Blue Devil's gotten his head wacked in a time too many, but that's his problem, and we got enough dead teen sidekicks already.

You're smart enough to build a fucking battle suit, so I'd hate to hear about you doing something stupid like trying to summon a demon or whatever. You know you watch too many horror movies pal.

As always hope, this letter finds you in good health – physically speaking at least.

Sincerely, your… pen-pal?

Jason P. Todd

PS: I'd be in a lot of trouble if anyone found out about this, so do me a favor and keep it under wraps.

 **xxx**

 **Purely self indulgent because there's hardly any Jason and Eddie content out there. I'll try to keep them in character, but i won't try very hard.**

 **Might take requests somewhere down the line.**


	2. Dear Jason (i)

Dear Jason,

Jason, oh my gosh, they told me you were dead! Well, they never really told me, they don't really tell people those kind of things, but I heard about it on one of those news sights when you stopped responding. Guess you were right about trusting everything those things say, should have figured someone would have told me if that was really what happened.

Where have you been? What have you been doing all this time? Did you ever find your mother? Why'd you quit being Robin? I always thought you loved it, but I guess your mom didn't want you doing it anymore or something?

I'm so psyched to hear from you again.

Things have been pretty rough since Aunt Marla, but I'm doing my best to keep going without her, so you don't need to worry about me dying any time soon. Some advice from a former street kid would be plenty helpful if you've got it.

I was actually thinking of trying out for the Teen Titans soon, maybe then I can get the tools to fix up the suit. Fingers crossed I get in. Look at me talking about joining a superhero team like it's some school club.

Speaking of school, where are you even going that you need this creepy ninja guy delivering your mail. He nearly gave me a heart attack when he showed up out of nowhere this time!

Is it some kind of Batfamily (there's so many of you now) or is your mom some cool ninja assassin or something? It would just figure with all those old kung-fu movies you used to watch. (You don't get to judge MY movie choices.)

Hey, I just had a great idea! You could try out for the Titans with me. Wouldn't that be great? It'd be just like that one time we teamed up, but every day! You always said you loved being Robin, but you could get some new name. (Pretty sure there's a height requirement now, just a warning).

If you're really retired from the whole thing, that's cool too, after that whole thing you saw on T.V a couple people from the Young Justice quit too, and the team broke up.

Or does your mom not want you superheroing anymore? Oh no, she'd not teaching you to be an evil overlord or anything like that, right? The whole friends to enemies thing is cool and all, but I'm not really looking for an arch enemy right now.

By the way, did you know Deathstroke has a daughter? Like, THE TERMINATOR Deathstroke. I haven't met her, but I hear she's going to be on the Titans too.

Seriously though, I can't believe you're still kicking, it really IS like you came back from the dead, I think this is one of the coolest things that's ever happened. As long as you don't come after my brains, cause I'm using them.

As always, I hope this letter finds you in good health. (Or any health, geez you're alive!)

Sincerely, your PenPal

Eddie A. Bloomberg

PS: I won't tell anyone about your letter, promise, hate for you to get grounded over this.


	3. Dear Eddie (ii)

Dear Eddie.

Alive, kicking, and hoping you stay that way too E, you saying you weren't invited to my funeral? I'm crushed really, another thing to add to the list of Batman's monumental screw-ups. To be honest, when I sent that letter I wasn't really expecting a response.

Mostly been doing schooling the past few months, taking some advanced courses abroad. It's mostly crappy hotels and teachers with mile high sticks up their asses but they know what they're doing, not much to say about it really. I'll be in Germany next week (or maybe already by the time you get this) so maybe I can send you a souvenir.

Advice from a street kid? Considering that ended with me getting caught stealing Batman's tires, you don't want my advice. Stay away from gangs and don't trust strangers is just common sense.

You're really looking to join the Titans? I'd say good luck, but I hear the new rosters a bunch of morons. You're waaaay to smart for them, and they'll know it the second they smell ya but if they're half as smart as I think they are (which isn't very) they'll take you on. It doesn't work out let me know, I might know some people who'd help you get a decent job with your brain. If you do end up joining, do me a favor and don't end up dead the way half of damned those kids do.

As for me, there is no way I will ever be squeezing this ass into spandex again. I got plans, huge plans for cleaning up Gotham that don't involve me wearing a cape, no evil over lord stuff I promise, but if that did come up, I would be honored to be your archenemy.

Don't worry too much about the couriers, they work for the Lady I mentioned before, I'll see about getting them to change their outfits for you. She's not my mom thank god, and I'd rather not talk about that, not ever in a million fucking years. I'm pretty she's just helping me out because she thinks I'm going to do something stupid on my own. As if I would ever, you know me.

Yeah I heard about Deathstroke's daughter, never met her either, he's a demented old bastard-goat, but his son was cool the few times I met him so I'd wait to see which part of the family she took after.

Again, hoping this letter finds you in good health.

Sincerely, your pen pal,

Jason P. Todd


	4. Dear Jason (ii)

Dear Jason

Aw come on, the Titans aren't that bad. You're just biased because Nightwing was on the team. Did he do something to make you mad again?

No need to worry about me ending up dead. I didn't get in.

Not sure what I was expecting, but Cyborg says I need more experience, they're being more picky about who they let in after what happened to Troia and Omen. How much experience is enough? Apparently it has more to do with mindset than time, and I just don't take it seriously enough. Guess I shouldn't have opened that interview with a joke. DO NOT trust google for interview advice. It doesn't matter all that much really. I'll just be more professional next time.

He actually brought you up, said you didn't take it seriously either. I don't think he knew I know you, when he said it, I said you had to have been taking it pretty seriously to agree to those short shorts. Cyborg didn't think that was funny either.

It makes me think, a lot of the newer sidekicks and heroes are a lot more uptight than they used to be. I mean, I've never really had a full conversation, with another sidekick, but that's the vibe they give off. I wonder whatever happened to make things like this. They don't get you can be serious about something and still have fun with it anymore. Or were we really just taking it too lightly?

Sorry, I guess you don't care much about this kind of hero community stuff anymore now you're out and... wherever you are by the time you get this.

Anyway, that's really cool, traveling around for school. Being you I doubt it's been the touristy places either. Where else have you been? If you get the chance while you're still in Germany, you should totally see the Berlin Zitadelle. It's got a great theater, and there's an old museum I bet you'd get a kick out of. If you get homesick there's, get this, a BATCAVE! Best part is they say it's haunted! It's really cool, I promise. Aunt Marla was even going to make a movie about it.

And there's a whole haunted forest too, they say if you go in, der Grossman makes you confess your sins and if they're really bad, he'll take you and no one will ever find you again.

Better than sitting around in a classroom isn't it? Bet it's easier for you than it was trying to finish assessments on set.

What are you studying now? If you're really studying at all, I heard the party scene over there is amazing. What am I saying, you've probably never been to a real party in your life. (Gala's don't count!)

But seriously, please tell me you're having SOME fun for the both of us while I'm sucking up to production studios. You don't have to bother with helping me, I'll be okay, but things will be so much easier when I don't have underage as a reason for them to fire me again. I swear. when I make it big, there'll be half as many of those rules on my sets. You can be part of the stage crew if you're bored of Gotham by then.

So the woman you're living with has ninja postmen? I'm not sure I want to know the story there if you don't want to get into it, but I'll bet it's real interesting. Of course you'd NEVER do anything stupid. The very idea that anyone would think any different appals me. You're the text book definition of foresight and caution, the GALL of anyone who thinks any different. (doodle of an angry face)

Hoping this letter finds you in unstupidly good health.

Sincerely, your penpal

Eddie A. Bloomberg


	5. Dear Eddie (iii)

Dear Eddie

Titans are assholes, moronic assholes who all donated their brains to the JL supercomputer and can't think for themselves any more. It has nothing to do with Nightwing. I haven't even spoken to that guy in years. Told you you were too smart for them and that's their loss. Losers are probably building a team of cannon fodder little kids who don't know what the hell they're doing. You've got more experience than half the grown ass adults patting themselves on the backs for doing things ass backwards and letting those kids out there.

You were plenty serious about hero work, the right mindset these days is dumbass and while you straddle the line real close, you'll never make that requirement. Sorry, truth hurts.

I get if you don't want handouts, and I swear that's not what this is. I told the new CEO of LexCorp about you, that's all I did (she saw you on that broadcast too) and she was really impressed. If you're still looking for work, call the number on the card I dropped in this envelope. Word of warning if you do end up taking the job, don't give them the plans for your suit. She's not Luthor, but he still technically owns the company, so yeah.

I know you wanted to work on movies like your aunt. but you'll need capitol for that, and the research salary at LexCorp is pretty good.

In other news. You'll be pleased to note that the damned forest, Schwarzwald (don't check my spelling on that) creepy fucking name, was in fact haunted. You'll be pleased to note it WAS haunted. Past tense. I checked it out because I was just a couple of miles away when your letter arrived and thought I could do with a vacation. That was not a fucking vacation, my God! I am never taking travel advice from you ever again. Do you even know any places that aren't haunted?

I was in the forest for about half an hour when things went to shit. Honestly I can't say I remember exactly what happened, but that ugly bastard should have known better then to mess with a dead man. It said some bull and didn't take well to "Talk shit get hit," for a reply.

Now it's gone or whatever and I'm being shipped off to monk school in the mountains because "magical enemies are something you should have prepared yourself for Jason". And I'm not getting anymore real teachers until I finish it. (You can't see it, but I'm rolling my eyes as I write this.) My god. I'm not going to be gallivanting after ghosts and werewolves, like, ever, I don't need to learn that kind of stuff. I don't get why anyone thinks I would need to learn that kind of stuff.

Also there was a clock museum. I don't know whose idea that was, and it wasn't haunted thank god. Turns our Black Forest cake is named after a liqueur that was invented around there. I had a lot of cake and it was heavenly.

The traveling's interesting and all, but I do miss school sometimes. Just the atmosphere of a class and whatever.

Originally I was in Germany to study life skills I guess you could call it and I was studying, no time for partys now Eddie (and the place was in the middle of nowhere). The teacher was an absolute asshole who drank these disgusting energy drinks like they were water. I sent you some as a souvenir, but really. don't drink them, they're gross. Inflict them on bad house guests instead. My sponsor was pretty pleased that he'll never ever be teaching again.

I was supposed to go study under a chemist next, learn medicine and whatever, but I thought I needed that dumb vacation, and now its monk school. God I hope they don't find out I'm calling it that, they're going to be more uptight than Nightwing's underwear, I can tell. Not sure how often I'll be able to write from there, but I'll do my best to keep you posted.

Also, if I do stupid shit, you do it way more often. If you could, I bet you'd actually be chasing after ghosts and werewolves right now. You'd probably BE a werewolf right now.

Hoping this letter finds you in good humanly health

Sincerely, your pen-pal

Jason P. Todd


End file.
